novel_reader.exe — Part 3, Chapter 32

Hot Topic

Part III: Blood & Ashes
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He was sixteen and he needed to use the bathroom and Elena had been in there for thirty minutes.

He knocked again.

"Elena."

Nothing.

"Elena, I'm serious."
"I'm busy."
"You've been busy since four o'clock. It is four thirty."
"Time is a construct."

He pressed his forehead against the door.

"I have to go to the toilet."

A pause. Then, completely unbothered:

"So go."
"That's what I'm trying to—"

He stopped. Took a breath.

"You're in the toilet."
"I'm not on the toilet. I'm doing my makeup. There's a difference."
"THEN WHY ARE YOU IN THE BATHROOM—"
"Because the light is good in here, oh my god, calm down."

He hit the door once with the flat of his palm. Not hard. Just to have something to do with his hands.

"Elena. I gave you twenty dollars this week. Twenty dollars. For the My Chemo Romance tickets. And this is how you repay me."

A beat of silence. Then:

"...that's what you get."
"WHAT—"
"It's My CHEMICAL Romance. It's not that hard to spell. Leave me alone, I have a date."

He stepped back from the door. Stared at it.

"You have a what now."
"A date. D-A-T-E. Go look it up."
"Nobody even knows you exist-"

He caught himself.

"Wait. Oh wait. Don't tell me. Don't tell me it's that guy. The guy from Hot Topic. The one you saw once and decided you were in love with."

The makeup brush sounds stopped.

"He acknowledges my existence," Elena said, with great dignity.
"Mhm. He doesn't know your name."
"He will after tonight."
"Elena." He put both hands on the door now, leaning in. "Elena, I am going to need you to open this door in the next sixty seconds or I will open it myself."
"You're not even on the toilet, you're just standing in the hallway being dramatic."
"I AM DRAMATIC BECAUSE YOU'VE BEEN IN THERE FOR THIRTY MINUTES—"
"Oh god." Her voice shifted, suddenly breezy. "If you wanna go so bad — you know, the parents aren't home, the grass couldn't be greener in the garden. Just dig a hole. Mind your own business."

He went very still.

"Are you," he said slowly, "telling me to go to the bathroom. In the garden. Like a dog."
"I'm offering you options—"
"WHY DID YOU CHOOSE THE BATHROOM. WE HAVE A MIRROR IN OUR ROOM, ELENA. YOU DID THIS ON PURPOSE—"
"The light in our room is terrible—"
"I SWEAR IF YOU DON'T OPEN THIS DOOR IN ONE MINUTE I WILL BREAK IT—"
"You're not going to break the door."
"I WILL BREAK THIS DOOR—"
"You're not," she said, utterly calm, "going to break the door."

He stood there for a moment, breathing hard.

She was right. He wasn't going to break the door.

He went and sat on the floor in the hallway with his back against the wall and his knees up, and stared at the ceiling, and waited.

• • •

She came out twenty-two minutes later. Full face, eyeliner sharp enough to cut something, wearing a band tee he was fairly certain she'd taken from his drawer.

She looked down at him on the floor.

He looked up at her.

"Is that my shirt," he said.
"No."
"That's my shirt."
"It looks better on me."

She stepped over his legs and went down the hallway toward the front door, then stopped. Turned back. She looked at him for a second — just a second — in that way she had sometimes, when the performance dropped and it was just her face, open and young and a little uncertain.

"You can use the bathroom now," she said.
"Thank you so much, Elena. Truly. What a gift."

She pointed at him.

"Don't wait up."
"I'm going to wait up."
"I know."

She almost smiled.

"Don't eat all the pasta."

The front door clicked shut behind her. The apartment went quiet — the particular quiet of a place that had just been very loud, still ringing with it slightly. He stayed on the floor for another minute, looking at nothing, listening to her footsteps fade down the stairwell.

Then he got up and went to use the bathroom.

The mirror was fogged from her hairdryer. There was mascara on the sink. The good towel had been moved. He looked at all of it and didn't say anything about it, because there was no one left to say it to.

He turned the light off when he left. He didn't know why. It just felt right to leave the room the way it should've been.

✻ ✻ ✻

Years later, Elena would stand in a different hallway outside a different closed door, and she would think about this — about the bathroom, about the thirty minutes, about the fogged mirror and the mascara on the sink. About how loudly he'd existed back then, how much space he'd taken up just being annoyed, just being there, banging on doors and threatening to break things he was never going to break.

She'd think: at least I knew he had to pee.
At least there was that.

She hadn't seen him come out once in three days. She didn't know how that was even possible. She didn't want to think about it too hard. She just stood in the hallway with Raul asleep against the wall beside her, listening to a house that had gone completely quiet, and tried to remember the last time a closed door between them had meant something as simple as bad lighting and a Hot Topic date.

It felt like someone else's life. It felt like a chapter that had ended without her noticing.
✻ ✻ ✻
The bathroom light is off now. It's been off for three days.
> Chapter complete. The light is off. Continue to next chapter? [Y/N]