novel_reader.exe — Part 4, Chapter 31

Where He Went

Part IV: The Space Between
> Loading Chapter 31...

Nobody knew where he went.

That was the fact at the centre of everything, the one that kept being returned to, the one that didn't change regardless of how many times it was examined. He had walked out of the café on Tuesday afternoon; the café on the north side, the one with the window seat, the one with the machine that made the right sound; and he had turned right onto the pavement and he had kept walking and at some point the city had absorbed him the way cities absorb people, completely and without ceremony, and he was gone.

The café had cameras. The police had the footage. The footage showed him leaving at 4:47 PM, hands in his jacket pockets, moving at a normal pace, not hurried, not looking over his shoulder, not doing anything that read as a person who knew they were being watched or followed or in danger. He turned right. He walked to the corner. He turned again. He was gone.

Nobody on the street had flagged anything.

Nobody had seen anything.

He was just.. not there anymore.

✻ ✻ ✻

Raul went through the apartment room by room.

He did this the night the news ran, after Elena had sat down on the couch and he had turned the TV off and they had stayed in the quiet for a long time and then he had gotten up and gone room to room with the specific focus of someone looking for a thing they already know is not there but cannot stop looking for.

His room: glasses on the nightstand. Phone charger still plugged in. Training bag in the corner, unpacked. The cabinet above the glasses, open, the space where the bottle had been.

The bathroom: toothbrush. The small hoop he took out when he sparred. His medication; the other one, the one for the knee, the one that wasn't the important one; still there.

The kitchen: nothing out of place. Nothing in the sink. A cup in the drying rack.

He had not packed anything.

He had not taken anything except himself and the jacket he was wearing and whatever was in his pockets.

Raul stood in the kitchen and looked at the drying rack and thought about the last thing he had said to him. Yeah. That had been it. He had said yeah and gotten in the car after sparring and they had driven home in the comfortable silence and he had gone inside and Raul had gone to the kitchen and that had been the last thing.

Yeah.
I should have said more.
I should have named it. The thing I was watching happen. I should have said it out loud.
I knew and I didn't say it and now—

He stopped that thought.

✻ ✻ ✻

The news ran the segment three more times that night.

The photograph they used was from a press event; the one where he had smiled at the cameras with the expression he kept for cameras, the one that was not quite the real smile, the one the world had catalogued and loved and distributed across every screen it owned. Raul watched the photograph on the screen and thought about the real smile; the lopsided one, the one from when he was twelve announcing he would be someone, the one that came up in the arena when the little boy's sign said GLITTER HAS TEETH; and the distance between the two felt immense and important and not something the news anchor could have known about.

The anchor said his name.

His name.

Raul looked at Elena.

Elena was looking at the screen with the expression she made when something was too large for a face.

He turned the TV off.

✻ ✻ ✻

The police asked questions.

They came to the apartment the next morning; two of them, professional, the tone of people who were gathering information and not yet drawing conclusions. They asked about his state of mind. About recent stressors. About whether there had been any indication.

Raul thought about the sparring session. The fourth round. Something's off. With the timing.
He thought about the cabinet above the glasses.
He thought about a woman he had watched circle them for two years; the articles, the schedule she had compiled, the specific precision of someone who had known things she shouldn't have known.
"He had been under some stress lately," he said.
"There was nothing that seemed like a warning."
"He just wasn't there."

The police wrote things down.

After they left Elena stood in the hallway and looked at him.

"You didn't tell them," she said.
"Tell them what," he said. "I don't have anything concrete."
"You have enough."
"Do I." He looked at her. "A feeling. A pattern. A woman who circles and writes and watches and has been doing it for two years and who—" He stopped. "If I tell them what I think and I'm wrong, she walks. And if I tell them and I'm right—"

He didn't finish the sentence.

Elena looked at the wall.

"He might have just needed to go," Raul said. Quietly. "He might have just.. needed to be somewhere else for a while. Away from it. The article, the medication, all of it—"
"You don't believe that."

He stood in the hallway of the apartment that was too quiet without him.

"I want to," he said.
✻ ✻ ✻

Three days.

The coverage grew the way coverage grew; the first segment, then the pickup, then the aggregators, then the sports outlets, then the think pieces. Where is the Fighter? The mythology generating new mythology, the absence becoming its own content. Tributes from other fighters. Statements from promoters. A candlelight thing outside the gym that he would have found unbearable.

Raul watched none of it.

He cooked. He answered Elena's knock on his door at 2 AM without asking why she was awake. He called the doctor's office; not the Fighter's doctor, a different number, a different approach; and was told the file had been flagged as inactive pending a review he didn't understand. He called back. He was put on hold. He was told someone would follow up.

Nobody followed up.

He sat at the kitchen table on the third night and looked at his phone and thought about Delaney Schulz in the newsroom with the heads going down as she passed. He thought about the conference room where Marcus had gone with sweat on his temple and unsteady hands and come back out looking like a man who had done something he hadn't decided whether to regret yet.

He thought about the camera in the corner of the bedroom with the ink on its lens.

He thought about the key under the mat.

He picked up his phone.

He put it down.

He picked it up again.

He did not know what he knew. He knew what he felt, which was that the apartment was wrong without him, which was that the city was going on out there and he was in here and somewhere out there; in one direction or another, for one reason or another; the person he had known since before this city, since before all of it, was somewhere the news couldn't find.
He hoped it was the direction that had a way back.
He did not let himself think too long about the other one.
✻ ✻ ✻

Outside the window Chicago went on.

The cabinet above the glasses stayed open.

Nobody closed it.

> Chapter complete. The cabinet stays open. Continue to Chapter 32? [Y/N]